IF the child downstairs with no toilet makes it all the way upstairs to the toilet--twice--then the child next door to the toilet cannot.
The child who initially cannot get to the toilet must stop immediately and finish wherever he/she is standing, particularly if he/she is standing on carpet.
If the child's room was JUST cleaned and all laundry picked up, garbage thrown away, etc. then that would be the perfect time for a vomit accident. The ideal target is the carpet.
Wait for it.... Wait for it........ The perfect time is when the stomach is full because a dinner was served that was appreciated by everyone (i.e. pizza and cookies). Remember--patience is a virtue!
If there is a clear and present target and the belly is full you can have the perfect storm!
If there are targets on the floor protecting the carpet (i.e. rug that could be put in an AUTOMATIC washer, towel, etc.) these must always be avoided.
In the event all targets cannot be avoided aim for the smallest one. (Thank you elementary school handbook for protecting your little square!)
When possible, splatter is nice.
Splatter is particularly effective in the little crevices on baseboards. Also nice on the furniture. This would be perfect if dresser drawers are left open a bit (thankfully ours were closed!)
Uncertainty is desirable. It is best to always leave the individual cleaning up the vomit wondering if all splatter spots have been found and cleaned up.
All action should take place between 11:00 PM and 3:30 AM. This is for two reasons: (1) All the toilet "cheerleaders" are MIA. You know--the people who yell, "RUN to the bathroom! DON'T stop! GO GO GO GO!!" (2) Vomit incidents must cause disruption--getting people out of bed is perfect!
Greatness means the need for more cleaning tools, chemicals, etc. To be superior a carpet cleaner or rental of some sort will be required in addition to the obligatory air freshener, rags, towels, soap, water, etc.
Persistence pays. Regarding the downstairs child, the third time is the charm!! (Vince woke up and I read him this post and he informed me that I slept through the one he cleaned up)
Always remember: "Any job worth doing is worth doing well!"
4 comments:
I'm super jealous of your "day of rest." You might as well laugh, right?
I can't decide if I should be offering you my condolences or laughing hysterically. How about a little bit of both?
I'm sorry that the little ones are sick (although I'm impressed...your husband spoke in our ward today and did a fabulous job in spite of your nighttime escapades...)
In the meantime, thanks for the laugh! If I get in trouble tonight at work for giggling in the dead silence (okay, fine...there's a ton of clicking and plenty of time to think) of the post office keying floor, I'm referring them to you. :)
Oh gross. Really gross. Ew! I really don't do well with vomit, so this whole post made me a bit queasy...
Ugh.... Oh, I have been there so many times!!! But usually, if Greg has to help clean up, I end up cleaning up after him too!!! He has a sensitive gag reflex!! :)
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